The end or a beginning...

Happily the last day of the year turned out to be a Sunday. Though it was a lazy day with lazy thoughts, my mind is fully equipped with whatever, it is difficult to assess and seems to throw me off the balance. I just decided to strongly ponder upon the facts of this year and answer the question why I am bogged with all this.

Actually the start of the year had nothing fresh to offer me, since I was with the same company and was continuing with the same kind of mechanical drudgery. The challenge at office was not new…because these challenges were due to the insufficiency of the organization rather than my own making. Change was no where in sight and the forces that would give me that change was not evident. Sometimes during July, I got a phone call from a consultant which led me to a change in job. September – my work base had changed. New office had forced a lot of change in to me. Normally I am reclusive, introvert guy and somebody had to force me to talk. Here I became a forced extrovert. The initial two months had not much impact on me as there was not much to do. Then I was asked to travel to Ireland for a knowledge transition, which was during November. The entire month, I was there understanding the client’s way of functioning. Ireland had a lot to offer me. In a way, I understood people here are just like us Indians and whatever were the pre-conceived notions about them had got erased out. I had some lovely friends, who genuinely loved to meet me and extend there relationship as a friend beyond the professional sphere. Like me, they were intrigued about our way of life. They ask me lot of funny questions about Indian way of life. It was surprise to me that outside India, we are looked upon as a great civilization; people respect us. It’s only us who don’t value ourselves. Most of the taxi-drivers I spoke during my long journey had great words to say about Gandhiji and his ideals. Young people talk about peace with the same breath they talk about Gandhian values. Back at Chennai, the environment at office had changed drastically. Like I said I had to move around with people. I had to make friendship with lots of people and came out of my own self-imposed shell. I was asked to led the show for a small set of people. I did lot of talking; making them understand, what I had learnt at Ireland. Everyday there were regular sessions of 4-5 hours. These activities brought forth my capabilities as a teacher. My subject matter was little, since it was related technical skill which people can easily learn. But I did a lot of talking on observing skill, technical problem solving, about life, humor and did my best to the make the sessions an engaging one. It was more interactive and feedback was encouraging to me. This was a good experience to me. I can see the changes happening inside me too.

As of my personal life, sometime during the course of the year, it was on shaky terrain. If I am asked to put in words about what transpired, it would be difficult. The strength of my feeling and emotion will not equate the strength of my words. My behavior was obsessive. I, as a person was strong to the point that I will never let anybody down. My belief in my own word was strong and was committed to each word I utter. I expected the same from each person I interact with. I derived strength from this person not realizing that it is within me. I had shared each moment of life with this person. I was literally giving a running commentary of my life. I never knew that time and situation had anything to do with relationships. I believed that, everybody is a reflection of me. I was wrong on many counts. I was naïve. I was self-destructive. And at last I was disturbing this person to the point that the confession came out that I was a disturbance and my presence in her life was a ‘time-being’. The lesson was that people change and they change for there own good. The lesson was good and I think this doesn’t deserve more words and thoughts.


My son has started uttering wonderful words. My prayer was answered. I wanted him to emulate Dennis ‘the menace’ and now I fear he is much more than that. He reads my mind like Sigmund Freud. He knows what makes me laugh and what makes me shout at him. He knows how to divert me. He knows the timing of each of my action. He knows his smiles will make me strong and whenever I am down, with his little pep talk fires the spirits inside to look ahead into life. At this moment of life, he is my biggest teacher. He gets the things he deserves and works hard towards achieving them. He never retracts from what he wants. He is a go-getter…proactive to the core. He believes that he is his best help.

When I look ahead, New Year is just going to be a change in the date and an addition to the number of year I have spent here. Any amount of resolution on this day will not change me. For me, lessons are learnt then and there and resolutions are set for a life and should not be restricted to this day. Lessons are inherent inside me; some just got dissolved into my blood and some into my heart. Some lessons have conditioned me so much that it got dissolved into my character trait. I am looking forward with excitement, each moment, each minute, each dawn with lots of expectation and positive signs of Life.

Thousand-Hand Bodhisattva Masterpiece

Thousand-Hand Bodhisattva Masterpiece - video powered by Metacafe

Ponder on this..!!!

Christmas Day

During my childhood days, Christmas was a grand festival just like Diwali or Pongal. Our family friends were Christians and celebrations were usually joint venture. It was a day filled with loads of briyani, meat, cakes and wine. Besides that our neighborhood had plenty of Christians, who invite us and shower my home with cakes and other eatables. Over the years, things have changed and Christmas has become just another festival. I yearn for those lost days....

Act of Faith

I saw an act of Faith today -
a man was on his knees;
Not in a pew or in a church,
but in a garden planting seeds.
-anonymous

sounds beautiful - by Erik Mongrain

Seems like I have to change my religion

I dont know ABC of Islam and this site beliefs that I am muslim to the core....My beliefs are just my belief and I consider myself a practising Hindu


You scored as Islam. Your beliefs are most similar to those of Islam. Do more research on Islam and possibly consider taking the shahadah and officially becoming a Muslim, if you aren't already.

Despite the actions of some - who go against the teachings of Islam - Islam is a religion of peace; the word "islam" means "peace through submission to God." "Muslim" means "one who submits to God." Islam is the third of the three Abrahamic faiths, and it shares much with Judaism in Christianity; its differences are the acceptance of Muhammad as the last and final prophet, and the oneness of God - in other words, that Jesus, though he was a revered prophet, was not in fact God, and only one God exists. Apparently the Taliban could not read (though their name means "students"), because the Qur'an states that men and women are equal as believers, and that all believers should be educated and seek knowledge. Modesty in dress and behavior is required in Islam for both men and women to preserve the values of society and move the emphasis from superificial appearance to intelligence, knowledge, and God.

Islam		100%
agnosticism		83%
Paganism		79%
Buddhism		71%
Judaism		67%
atheism		67%
Hinduism		50%
Satanism		25%
Christianity		17%

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with QuizFarm.com

Revisit

I took a long break from anything that meant I should think hard. I had gone on an official trip to Ireland for a month. This trip was for a purpose and I wanted to excel in it. I made a conscious decision to concentrate on what was on hand. I think, I have done exceptionally well and had no complains about the outcome.

This was my first visit outside of India, which makes it an exciting and interesting one. Ireland, like what I have seen in Television or movies, is beautiful country with lots of landscapes (no wonder there most loved sport is Golf) and greenery everywhere. There were lots of contrasts between India and Ireland…climatic conditions being the major one. The temperature ranges from 3° Celsius to 10° Celsius. That was important change to me, since there was change in my mood also. It was kind of sober and melancholic at times. The sun makes appearances on rare occasions.

Back in India, I took 1 week to catch up with rhythm of life and here I am…again with same patches of happiness, bundled with worries and getting on life wondering what next.

joy forever

A thing of beauty is joy forever

preparations for new project and me

i have been assigned the task of visiting the client's place and study the systems over there. i don't have prior knowledge in this area. my experiences in the previous organisations is limited to accounting, rather than these kind of exercise.
the way, my organisation is preparing me is not so impressive. i feel people who are dealing with the client is not having a structured migration progress. the way situation is being handled is haphazard and is confusing me. even the way they are organising my travel arrangement...well...i have the least to mention about it.

my friend who is visiting UK this weekend...is not sure about the trip until the moment he steps on to the plane..

well...i m having my fingers crossed...let me see

anyways here is a site which is a sort of search engine..a big bandwith might be helpful to load this...
http://www.msdewey.com/

bitter or better

beer is better

Dennis behind me...

My son is more willing to do the job for me than allowing me to do it myself. he is interested in moving the mouse around and typing the letters for me. when he was in the womb i prayed that he should be like the comic character Dennis the menace...and my prayer was answered. even now he is shaking the mouse and pulling out the cd-rom. now when i shout at him...he kind of shows fingers and sticks at me threatening me to dire consequences. frankly i have to learn from this kid...he has lots up his sleeves. the magic he spuns around the neighbours...the charms he exhibits on the strangers...the smile which will cool the sun...and a lot. he comes out of any kind of situation..thats my son...the creativity or working knowledge he exhibits with little knowledge. he surely knows my weakness....

Break or laziness

well, it was long, long time since I have visited this site to post my musings. matter was that there was no musings all thru' these day, since there was lot of changes happening in my professional sphere. going ahead, i expect some paradigm shift inside me. days are fast approaching for me to prove a point or two to myself. my work culture now involves lot of discipline and the ability to grasp things as fast as possible...with this knowledge i m approaching with greater vigour...i wish myself 'best of luck'

well, the above was not the reason for lapse in posts...it was due to laziness...talking about discipline...

I try...no I will

Everyday i try to be new, stronger person,
everyday i try to battle it out...
everyday i believe the struggles
i m going thru' is worth the effort...
everymorning when i open my eyes..
i expect the positive rays of sun will
wash away the negative of yesterday..

everyday i try to control the pain..
i will not let it control me..
as it did a few months back...
i am in control...i am in total control..
and i will not allow anybody into my inner sanctum..
b'coz i know they will leave one day and also
it's a place no body can handle..

i will keep trying to win the impossible odds against me.
i will... i must...

favourite quotes...

This is my take on favourites quotes...condensed from another site with my won inputs....

01. Love. —The Prophets

Jesus, Gandhi, Buddha. All the world's religious saints and prophets hold love as a central value, the glue that anchors the universe.

We hear, "Love makes the world go round," and "Love heals all wounds." These are familiar themes: love of friends, ideas, and self. Love of God and of country. Even love of life itself. If I could only have one word for all eternity, love would be my choice.

2. Know thyself. —Socrates

In career development, self-knowledge is everything. In a career, you can be two or three degrees off course and walk into a wall, instead of through a doorway. You don't have to be far off to have it fail.

Career unhappiness often results from lack of focus, and lack of focus stems from limited self-knowledge. But self-knowledge takes time, introspection, and effort. So it's easy to avoid. I am quit bad at it.

3. Inches make champions. —Vince Lombardi
Making that extra move that other’s failed to do….that makes a lot of difference. I have my own experience of instance wherein I had given up and a last thought asked me to travel an extra inch to achieve the unachievable.

4. Nothing gold can stay. —Robert Frost

Now CAREER = CHANGE. You'll have five careers in a lifetime, maybe six. Perhaps you'll do part-time, project, interim, or consulting work. And even if you're in your ideal dream job today, that might change tomorrow. Nothing gold can stay. Change is constant thing with our life. In these era….good things come in small packages.

NOTHING GOLD CAN STAY — by Robert Frost

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

5. Work is love made visible. —Kahlil Gibran
About 80% of people are unhappy at work, and 20% are happy. Our culture has separated work from passion, and taught us to prefer a higher paycheck to higher happiness. That mistake costs us our souls. The goal of career development is to uncover one's gifts and passions, and to link them to the practical needs of the world. We call that "being in the right place," "finding a good fit," or "making the best use of one's talents."

High compensation and high happiness are not incompatible. It's not that we shouldn't seek money, and lots of it; many of our clients do. But we should first seek to love, or at least to like, what we're doing. That's the realization of our highest calling.

6. No great thing is created suddenly. —Epictetus (A.D.200)

We live in a McDonald's culture. We want everything instantly and without effort. And we bristle when others around us appear to be getting more, sooner. Waiting for rewards or results is out of favor. It is so uncool.

The sudden ‘puliotharai’ or ‘briyani’ is not equal to the laboriously prepared ones by my mother. They are adequate, functional, or practical improvements. Greatness requires thought and time, effort and sacrifice. Especially sacrifice.

Stellar careers aren't built overnight. Think about Edison, Einstein, or Galileo, or anyone else you might admire. None of them got there overnight.

Great careers are built upon hundreds of thousands of small efforts, undertaken daily, that eventually grow into a series of satisfying wins. An ad for Paul Masson Vineyards picturing a bottle of wine said, "Nothing good happens fast." I framed it, and hung it in my office.

7. Well done is better than well said. —Benjamin Franklin

This is a variation on "Actions speak louder than words" and on Shakespeare's superb quote, "Talkers are no good doers." An executive search consultant who recruited 500 bank presidents told me, "There are two kinds of candidates: tap dancers and superstars. Tap dancers go through the motions and superstars get the work done. I recruit the superstars."

8. No wind favors he who has no destined port. —Montaigne

The cliche, "If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there," is valid. And many careers are broken by lack of direction. Corporations define this concept as having a mission or vision, and organizations lacking vision usually flounder. "Career Planning" speaks to the idea of creating a blueprint for your future. That is, having a goal, a destined port—fulfilling your destiny. Stephen R. Covey said it well in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People when he advised us to "Begin with the end in mind."

9. Sometimes even to live is an act of courage. —Seneca

I've been there. You've been there. Sometimes life is hard. You hit a career roadblock or dead end. Nothing seems to be working. You're fired or laid off. Or worse yet, you and your spouse are both unemployed. It happens. And it happens more frequently than you might imagine, to good people, qualified candidates, because of circumstances beyond their control. I like Churchill's words, "Never give in, never, never, never, never; in nothing, great or small—never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense." And I especially like the quote by Edmund Burke, who said: "Never despair, but if you do, work on in despair."

10. Do first things first, and second things not at all.—Peter Drucker.
It's so easy to do what's familiar, comfortable, or fun. It's so difficult, sometimes, to tackle the highest priority. And sometimes it's difficult to even know your top priorities; hence, the phrase, "I can't see the forest for the trees."

We suffer from over-choice: 67 varieties of toothpaste, 487 styles of shoes, 186 brands of cell phones with 137 telephone companies. We demand more variety than we could possibly need or want; and as a result, we get lost in options, opportunities, and choices. There are 87 varieties of lawyers, and 75 specialties inside medicine. The world of work can be a confusing landscape.

When you're flooded with career possibilities, or "swimming up Niagara Falls," it's good to spend time answering questions like, "What is the best and highest use of my talents?" and, "How can I make a bigger impact?"

If you can't establish clear career priorities by yourself, use friends and business acquaintances as a sounding board. They will want to help. Ask them to help you determine your "first things" and "second things." Or seek an outside coach or advisor to help you focus. Because if you don't know what your "first things" are, you simply can't do them FIRST.

Your friend,

vinukv

catching up with the day

when i have lot of time to spend, i wonder how to spend it and at the end of the day, i brood over wasting time. time management is a skill and plenty of discipline goes into it. towards the end of the week, the pace of life gradually reduces. just imagine the vigour with which we start the monday morning....it is more like the start of 100 metre race. the expectations, deadlines and tensions of our profession makes it more interesting and worthwhile...probably that adds pep to life. just imagine a life without all these tensions, its a vacuum out there..life is out.

Solitude

this picture was shot at Chavakad beach near Guruvayur. on the way to the beach, i found that there is nothing exciting about the place....but once i saw the shore, it turned out to be the most beautiful place i have ever visited. it had kind of hawaiian luk with lots of coconut trees lined up near the shore...it had a tropical environment. i was alone there and my loneliness suddenly seem to less matter to me. the emptiness of the beach seem to symbolize me and the waves seem to be my rising thoughts. i saw throngs of people playing and dipping and testing the pulse of the mighty sea.

multitude of waves
and a lonely me
multitude of thoughts
and a lonely decision

there is a reason why i love to be on the road...as i travel further i leave behind the memories..flashes of places and glimpses of changed expressions pass through me...as i travel, i feel like a cloud that mingles with everything...the fellow clouds, trees, mountains, etc and never will i unite with any of this..

be a cloud...!!!!

Quote of the day

If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.

- Herman Hesse, German novelist

On love...Helen Fisher

an interesting link on love through ramzlinks.



Helen Fisher is an anthropologist with Rutgers University, specializing in gender differences and the evolution of human emotions. Her most recent book is Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love. In this wide-ranging talk, she outlines the bio-chemical foundations of love (and lust), and discusses the natural talents of women, and their new significance in the modern world. (Recorded February 2006 in Monterey, CA. Duration: 24:13)

Today

Hmmmm....end of the day and I am wondering what has happened with me today that can be called as 'life-changing' or 'life enhancing'. The induction programme with my new company went off well; actually it got started yesterday and I was not particularly enjoying it. I had to sit for 8 hours and listen to the lecture delivered. It had lot of sense in it, but then sitting for 8 hours...reminds my school days. Out here, it is totally a different culture...one which I was not used to it. It is customer-oriented. I find there is lot to learn in this area. I see myself as an entreprenuer and the knowledge from this organisation will be helpful to me in my future endeavours..

as always....gud luck to me.....

Things I consider in life….

01. feeling great about life and the thought that life is gift to me to be lived
02. coming out of situation that I consider as a bad predicament
03. feeling the positive in everything
04. my love for anything abstract
05. sometimes beer acts as a prozac
06. I believe that I have good grasping power and is especially able to understand any systems
07. I feel both control and controlling is illusion and convincing is a better act. Egomaniacs control.
08. genuinely feel that respect for individual is hallmark for any good relationship

pick the one vch makes sense

Some anonymous creature has written this...pick the ones vch makes sense to you....


1. Science has proven that the domestication of animals has resulted in a progressive erosion of their mental facilities. The domestication of humans has led to similar effects.
2. Your life is passing in front of you, you are getting old. You are going to die, and you're never going to be on television.
3a. Get drunk and have sex at 4 am on a Tuesday in the back of a running cop car while the pig's in the Chinese restaurant shaking poor Johnny Wong down for Chow Mein leftovers. Call in sick to work tomorrow.
3b. Stop being afraid of everything.
4. It has been structured so that we "need" money to survive. Most options for "earning" money involve us trading a large portion of our limited lives. Our "work" usually involves meaningless repetition that runs absolutely opposite to our human nature. Not only is our "work" boring, it is enforced with strict behavioral rules and the constant fear of being "fired". It has been rammed down our throats that this is a "reality", and that the benefits of this planned system outweigh the negatives. It is becoming increasingly clear that this may not be the case.
5. Being cool to people gives them hope. It gives you hope too. Help anyone who needs it and pay back every favor given to you in spades. Assholes are their own punishment.
6. This is my body. I'm the one who moves it around and I'm the one who makes it do amazing things. I will take full responsibility for the actions of this body. I will not be controlled by the body of another.
7. There is no priest, no politician, no boss, no cop, and no concerned citizen who will ever convince me that they are performing functions necessary to my continued existence. They do not matter, they only impede. There are no masters and there are no gods. There are only people who demand life, and people who demand control. Whose side are you on?
8. There is nothing sexy about mass production, hamburgers, or soda pop. American consumer 'culture' must continue to be ignored at home and worldwide. Yankee go home, and take yer shitty food with you.
9. Sex is awesome. So is a good burrito. So is a round of drinks with friends. So is reading. So is sleeping late. You shouldn't feel bad about constantly enjoying yourself. Misery loves company. So does boredom. Ignore the telephone.
10. Freedom is the only important thing, personal liberty the only pathway to dignity. Anything that stands in the way is the enemy, no matter what costume it wears. Stop being afraid of everything.
11. Nobody knows anything. Everyone is lying. Look out for each other.
12. Do Not Pet The Tiger. The Tiger is Sick.
13. It is an easy power to ridicule everything with sarcasm and irony, anyone can do it. It's much harder to give things a chance and try to understand. As smart as you are, there is always something to learn, and, conversely, always something to unlearn. Stop being afraid of everything.

Timeless classic

Subject of the matter is hindi songs. Over the years, hindi songs have evolved into termendous form. I have been connoissuer of hindi songs since my childhood days, when our vividh bharati played 'aap ke fankar' programmes. those days i was forced to listen to it due to my father's interest. especially during the holidays, my afternoons were filled with songs of yore...i was dragged to my afternoon nap listening to these songs. right now, while listening to these songs i get connected to those moments of that life. Anand & Abhimann were big favourites of me. nostalgia perks up, when i listen to those songs now.

Dennis...we have him here

When my son was in my wife's womb...I prayed that he should be more like Dennis the Menace. In fact, God answered my prayer and now I am suffering the consequences. I love Dennis...basically b'coz of his aversion towards oldies. Oldies, who are having difficulty in catching up with this generation...SMS generation....anything more than 4 words is categorized
as lecture.

Love is

an all pervasive, potent force that sometimes strikes you without our knowledge. There is no reason, why somebody should love somebody…it strikes us just like that…without any prior knowledge or data. It can not, but only have divine meaning attached to it….it is some sort of cosmic revelation. It brings in you that belief that everybody is inter-connected and are in some form or the other divine.

It is morning in Africa

I happened to read this wonderful short poem and which just about sums up all our lives...

It is morning in Africa and
As the sun rises over the plains
The gazelle awakens knowing that
If it cannot outrun the fastest lion
It will be dead.
It is morning in Africa and
The lion awakens knowing that
If it cannot outrun the slowest gazelle
It will die.

It is morning in Africa and you had better start running.

Anyways....I have decided to start jogging from tomorrow morning....

Cutest prayer

Sounds sensible to me...hope the elders listen to this first rather than God..

Signs of Welfare state

do i have to take a avatar of a journalist to report this? actually this is not of much concern but sometime when value of time goes up and you find the traffic rather slow and acting as a obstacle to reach your destination...you tend to get out of the bus and slap the creators of this mess. as usual i was passing through prathanana theatre in ECR and the traffic at that hour was horrible to worst.

i think when the governent hands out permission for some commercial activities to take place in a public place..it should act rather diligently...it should analyse the implications of there action on the general public. I think, having a theatre right on the main road...it is utter nonsense...it disrupts of flow of the traffic. There should be some acts or rules in this regards...like for example in France, or any other sensible country for that matter,all the petrol bunks are located 1 km away from the city limits..this is what you call a welfare state.

Reasons

The problem with blogging is that that you should be ready with the content when the time demands. I have never had a constructive thought about anything...that is, I am never sure of anything...the reason being that there is so much free knowledge littered around, that you start feeling disillusioned and never know which is right. Just visit a few blog site or information sites....there is fair amount of free will displayed and the authority of the language makes you believe that what is printed on the screen is right.

Business & communication

Eventhough by profession, I am an accountant, I am beginning to realise that I mostly do communicating than the real profession of accountancy. Out of the eight hours or more, I spent at office, 90% of the time is spent doing jobs which are related to passing of informations. This is done through a variety of modes...especially via email. So, at the end of the day, what matters most is how good I was at communicating than how good I was at accounting.

Nowadays, information is within your hand reach...the addresses are at your figure tip..aided by the 'www' revolution. I don't think anybody is buying encyclopedias nowadays. Morever, knowledge accumulation has to be done on minute to minute basis as things are becoming obsolete in no time. Consistency is a thing of past now....and 'now' is happening.

Skipping from the main line...I found this at "Alchemist"...

[Destiny] is what you have always wanted to accomplish. Everyone, when they are young, knows what their destiny is. At that point in their lives, everything is clear and possible. They are not afraid to dream, and to yearn for everything they would like to see happen to them in their lives. But as time passes, a mysterious force begins to convince them that it will be impossible for them to realize their destiny.It's a force which appears to be negative, but actually shows you how to realize your destiny. It prepares your spirit and your will; because there is one great truth on this planet: whoever you are, whatever it is that you do, when you are really want something, it's because that desire originated in the soul of the universe. It's your mission on earthTo realize one's destiny is a person's only real obligation. And when you want something, the universe conspires in helping you achieve it.

Mediocrity & Genius

In the real sense, putting thoughts into exact words is difficult. Expressing ourselves is a difficult art...that's the real difference between a genius and mediocre person. Everybody is gifted with wonderful thoughts and it is unique and individualistic by nature...just by understanding this uniqueness will give us enough pride to express ourselves. Born as human being we are supposed to express ourselves in our own unique way....finding this unique quality or talent is the essence of life. The idea is not to compromise on our capabilities or talents.

The centre idea of Ayn Rand's books were about this uniqueness, which was displayed by the protagonistic. There is always a conflict between the mediocre person who has compromised his thoughts ( which always flows with the tide of society) and so-called genius, who does not compromise his ideas and goes about proving his worth. Most of the time, these people are cornered and subject to tiring tests to prove there claims. And most of the time, the mediocre with there excellent social skills, push the genius to the background and gets the credit. In real life, mediocrity always wins...for the time being...but it does not withstand the necessity to prove.

The afterthought is tht society always fears people who does not conform to the traditional pattern and they loathe change of any nature....

What I am?

What I am?

01. I am what I think I am
02. my knowledge about myself is as much as the other person knows about me
03. I am almost predictable
04. I don’t trust anybody since I don’t trust myself
05. My values are not well defined
06. my confidence level fluctuates
07. my world is confined to the area I live in
08. I lost interest in sports b’coz I am not playing any now
09. my life does not circle around anything…does it? Yeah…that is a secret
10. my interest lies in????? prioritized not necessarily according to list below
a. books
b. developing myself…maybe a brand soon
c. girls
d. little bit of information about happenings around the world
e. music
f. friendship
g. loving
11. I don’t have any idea about what I am doing with my life?
12. love my son
13. my pendulum of life is not fixated…it is wayward
14. what I look to do.?
a. reading
b. traveling
c. working may be
d. chatting may be
15. movies that I love
a. any movie that does not test viewers intelligence
b. anything that makes sense
c. GODFATHER…seems to be my alter ego
d. Nayagan in India
e. That talks about relationship
f. That talks about human values
g. That does not invade the privacy of lovers
h. That has a world in itself
i. That is not a shadow of life…but a piece of life
16. my idols
a. I am wondering
b. Still I am wondering
c. Maybe me
d. The beautiful me
e. My reflection in the mirror
f. The puzzling me
g. Still that big narcisstic ME

MST you did this week?

What is the most significant thing you did this week?

Occassionally I stumble upon such profound questions...yeah...I do ask this question at the end of everyday. I never had a good answer to this question. When the time starts where upon you don't have a answer to this question...I think the situation is quite dangerous. It is most important that we have some purpose or meaning in our life...agreed that at the term end of our life...we will be left with nothing..but then dying even while we are living is as good as living without a purpose or objective. Frankly speaking if somebody questions me, what is the purpose of my life...then I might have a blank expression. When I run the slides of all the activities I had done during this week, nothing corresponds to what I really want to do with this life. I am nursing a wish , which I don't even have the confidence to tell or talk about. Nothing anti-social or mean about it....it is all about my level of confidence and effort I take. Again...let me be little frank...did I do something today to further my wish...NO.

This week I want to focus on the following issues...

1. my academic interests - that will enhance my resume.
   - I should spend more time reading books related to academic interest....whereas
   I spent most part of leisure time(while outside office) reading fiction.
2. my profession relationship - that will enhance my presence in the top management
   - I maintain a very low profile with my other department colleagues mostly b'coz I
   don't have time to interact and also I don't see any reason to do so...the only advantage
   such an attitude has is that I keep away from office politics
3. Managin money matters - increased purchasing power.
   - once in a while, there is heavy flow of cash and I get an increased sense of purchasing
   power...money is power, if used sensibly...being a spontaneous buyer, I need to lock
   my purse to save money for the winter.
   
   "If we all did things that we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves"
   - Thomas Edison
   
   

29 minutes before midnight

I have started hearing the small breathing hissing sound made by my family members while they sleep. For the past 2 years, it has become a habit with me to stay-up till 12 in the midnight. When I was young, beyond 10.30 pm, was midnight and we were told that creepy shadows moved around and so we were asked to close our eyes. The fact is that time moves so fast that it zips by and catching up with the luxuries are rare nowadays. There are days when I have enough time even then I waste it wondering what to attend to first.
When I am drowsy, my mind stops working and dreamy, unrecognizable world takes over. My whole perception changes and I am not what I was few hours back.

And then as I was browsing, I stumbled upon this nice song by Katie Melua…never heard about her before…but this song is good....I got it from her Myspace site. True to the title...it sounds as if just in heaven.

http://www.myspace.com/katiemelua

Why

do I write or make an attempt at it? Most of the time, when I try to write something, my mind runs around in search of contents. This seems to be a life without much happening in it. I have seen minds which are treasure trove of information and perspectives. I worship those inquisitive and sensitive minds. Those are minds of people who really live and rather they don't let life bypass them. They always have something interesting to say or write about. There thoughts are not in coherent with the general opinion of the lay man. I like people like that, who voice out who they are really in this jungle of homogeny.

50 minutes before midnight

We got our freedom during the midnight and and I am getting mine just 50 minutes before. I have decided to go for a fresh blog site, which will showcase my perspective about the day and the casual thoughts about it. Right now, since it is almost midnight, my thoughts are all about sleep and having a good dream to wake me up in the morning